Paradoxically yours

I was musing about a few paradoxes, at this paradoxically weird, for most of you, time of the day. In my honest opinion, life's paradoxes and ironies metamorphose an otherwise dull day into a bright sprightly dawn where you keep musing "Why, God, Why?". An alternate exposition of "Why, God, Why?" could mean "Why, God, Why? Why am I destined to reading this?", but I hope it would be the former. A few of such gems here...

• Greenland is icy, while Iceland is green ( 80% of Iceland is green, according to National Geographic ). So, why did whomever named these islands do so ? Call it paradox-love or sheer stupidity ?
• Proceeding on the geographic string, "Netherlands" is, needless to mention, the heaven on earth to most men, with its notoriously famous components. Etymologically, "Nether Lands" is an English-equivalent of Hell. Maybe the English are so upright when it comes to Amsterdam's dames or was it a statutory warning in disguise ?
  
• The English Language is a rich feasting ground for paradox-hunters. The word "Big" is small, while "miniscule" is way too long for its meaning. Throw these words to a non-English speaking adult, and the specimen is bound to be muddled at why "Big" is thrice as small as "miniscule", while it means otherwise.
• If a joker jokes, does a poker poke ? I've played poker, but no card has been lucky enough to poke me.
• The English should've been facing a dearth of words, and decided to deploy the same set of words to imply different meanings. "Train" & "Coach" at a football game is way different from "train" & "coach" at a metro rail station. Dear Puritans, learn from Tolkien and Rowling.
  
• If "f l o o d" is pronounced "flud", shouldn't "f l o o r" be "flur" ?
  
• Other languages are not immune, either. Read this piece from a quiz trivia, so correct me if I'm wrong. "Urs", supposedly, represents "a wedding anniversary" in Hindi, while a similar sounding word in Persian - "Uroos" - means "death". Is that why men are scared of entering into wedlock ? Or was the word "wedlock" cunningly coined to imply that if you are wed, you are locked, god knows where, forever ? Muse, my single masculine mates !...
• The Hundred Years War, between England and France, was actually 116 years long ( 1337 - 1453 ). Losing count, are we?
• French Fries did not originate in France.
• Termites dwell in an "ant hill".
• Guinea pigs are neither from Guinea, nor are they pigs. They are rodents.
• Saltwater Taffy is made from freshwater.
  
• This one's, ironically, mine and if you've stayed with me this long, then you're truly privileged. If the first two months were christened "January" and "February", shouldn't the third month be "Marchuary"?. Maybe, it pronounced death to the christening process, for it sounded "mortuary".

A day has a day and a night, 12 hours each. Why is each of the 365 units of a year not called a night? ( Prejudist Diurnals.. ),
A Nocturnal.